ABCD Exchange : May 1999 : Gatherings - Storytelling : Grieving and Growing

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Story Work, Soul Work: A Workshop on Grieving and Growing through Storytelling
by Valerie Jean

Storytelling is as old as humankind. Stories entertain and inform, chastise or praise, and often carry the basic truths of a culture, its history, values and beliefs. Even in societies where technological advances might seem to co-opt this uniquely human practice, stories are the basis for books, television, film, and even Web sites. But can storytelling help people who are grieving?

In his book, The Gift of Stories, Robert Atkinson writes, "We are all, all of us, living stories "There is power in storytelling that can transform our lives."

Gail Rosen, a gifted storyteller, knows this power well, and teaches others to use it to cope with grief and loss. This spring, Rosen presented a workshop to a group of almost 200 people at St. Agnes Hospital Center in Baltimore, MD. A nationally certified professional bereavement facilitator, Rosen offers a variety of storytelling workshops and performances nationwide. She admits that she is most "drawn to tell stories that address the big questions about life and death, purpose and despair, grieving and comfort." In bereavement workshops, Rosen shows how a grieving person can "insert" his or her own story into the one being told as a way to understand one’s own experience.

Rosen opened the program by singing a song with a straightforward message of remembrance: "Listen. Listen. Listen to my heart song. I will never forget you. I will never forsake you," she sang. Throughout the three-hour workshop, Rosen intertwined her own stories, and an amazing array of stories from many cultures, with bereavement work.

Rosen invited her listeners to think of a loss they had experienced while she told another story. Participants each wrote three sentences beginning with the statement, "Before the loss, I." Rosen discussed healing, told another story, and encouraged the audience to write three more sentences, beginning with, "After the loss, I "

Rosen showed participants how to listen with compassion.

Rosen talked about creating "listening space," which she sees as a tremendous aid to bereavement work. "Listening is the most consistent and powerful tool, the one least likely to do harm whenever you are privileged to accompany someone on a journey into grief," Rosen said. She believes that listening "with all your senses" allows necessary spiritual energy to be present. "Although there is only one God, there are many roads to heaven," she said.

Valerie Jean is a poet, writer and teacher in Maryland.

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